I was brought up in a happy house. My parents loved each other, and us kids, I had older brothers and sisters who loved me and protected me. As an adult I realize that maybe there were times when money was tight, but as a kid, I never knew that. I had what I needed and then some, in all aspects of life. So, I guess when bad stuff happens I always look for that silver lining.
How can you find a silver lining in something as awful as cancer? Well, when I read my friend Jill Kelly's book "Without a Word: How a Boy's Unspoken Love Changed Everything" I thought, if they could find hope and the silver lining in losing their son to Krabbe's disease, then, really, we should all be able to find the silver lining in our lives' worst struggles. The silver lining doesn't make the pain go away, but it brings to us aspects of our lives we wouldn't have had if it weren't for the awful thing we went through. For the Kelly's it brought their family back together and it gave them their faith, which has become an essential piece of who they are.
This past weekend was an eye-opener for me. For the second year in a row, I participated in The Dempsey Challenge to benefit the Patrick Dempsey Center for Cancer Hope & Healing. The center gives cancer patients things they don't get with normal treatment. Massage, Reiki, financial counseling, educational classes, a shoulder to cry on, or many other things to help them deal with what they are going through. A whole person treatment approach. Having lost many who suffered without a place to go for help like this, I can appreciate the relief patients and their families feel as the walk through the doors. This weekend, the Dempsey Challenge helped me to find the Silver Lining of the cancers that have taken my friends and family, and still threaten to take more.
Cancer pissed me off. It made me so mad, that I sought out a way to do something to cancer. I wanted to take something from cancer, as it had stolen so much from me. I wanted to hurt it the way that I hurt. Since Cancer is not a person and has no feelings, I fought with the tools I had. Fundraising and my bike. This is how I found the Dempsey Challenge. I searched for something that could combine my desire to get back in shape and help people who are suffering from cancer. The mission of the Dempsey Center caught me, and I knew I had something worth fighting for. I never knew exactly where this path would lead me, and there is much yet left to explore in this challenge, but so far I have found so much good, that it made me see the silver lining.
Nothing can give me back my family and friends that I have lost, or take away that pain. Noone can ever take their places in my heart. But what I have found is that I am renewed in my quest to fight cancer. To date I have lost 35 pounds and got into a size 4, something I haven't seen since my late teens. I'd call that a silver lining. And not just the jeans, or the weight, but the biking I have done to complete this challenge has me in the best shape of my life. It gave my husband and I something to do together. And it encourages our children to exercise with us as well. Another silver lining. Then there are the people. All of the lovely folks who work at and volunteer at the Center. Their patients with stories so touching that the move you to tears and the hundreds of people who supported me in my efforts to do something about something we often feel powerless against. The friendships, both face to face and over the internet, that have been forged out of a mutal hatred of cancer and its ugly effects, have brought so much joy to my life, the stories have truly changed my outlook on life. How is it possible that something so good has come from something so bad? Well, I guess that it is true that every dark cloud has a silver lining, because this cloud called cancer has stormed upon me many times, but I am left with many silver linings. Those silver linings are what we need to hold onto. Because without the silver linings, without making some good out of the bad, we let the evil thing called cancer win, and to me at least, this is NOT accceptable.
So thank you all for your support over this journey. My silver linings are countless and cancer will not prevail. This past weekend not only did I meet many more people to add to my list of silver linings and spend time with some who were already on the list, but I accomplished something not many can say, and something I would have never imagined I could do before The Dempsey Challenge. It may have taken over 7 hours to do it, and I may have missed most of the day's festivities in the park, but I completed the 100 mile course of the Dempsey Challenge. Alongside my husband, Tom, and our friend AJ Riley, I crossed the line, marking 100 miles for the first time in my life, to the smiling faces of my children, my mom, and my friends, Dee and Jan (AJ's mom). Raising about $8,500 this year while training for a task that last year I could not complete, I knew that the big challenge for me was to finish that 100. The pride I feel at how much help can come to those suffering from cancer because of my efforts is equal to the pride of knowing that I did it. I made 100 miles. So, suck that cancer. You may be a powerful foe, but as Chumbawamba sings "I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down" Thanks for reading, and I hope you all find your silver linings!
